August 14, 2004
Ape Recycling
Someone is going to miss the apes when they move out in two weeks, but it isn’t me.
It’s the old guy who comes around early in the morning on recycle days to pick the bottles and cans from various recycle bins that are set out on various curbs in the neighborhood. I assume he trades them in for cash somewhere, but I don’t know the ins and outs of these things. And as you can see, our house is a sweet spot. This is just five days’ worth. So sweet is this spot that there is now competition for it. The usual guy is now coming on Sunday mornings–creeping quietly onto our porch and gingerly taking the bins out onto the curb to pick over them. Monday morning, another guy comes by and dejectedly picks over the cardboard and newspapers that remain after Sunday’s harvest.
Poor guys, when the apes move out they’ll be bereft. I’ll have to give them the apes’ forwarding address. All they’ll get from me and the newbies will be a few milk cartons and pizza boxes. Maybe a random Snapple bottle.
Filed by cynthia rockwell at 11:26 am under Apes
Man Cynthia, looks like your pad is (or was) the party people’s place to be. The old dude who comes by to collect the bottles might just be reminding himself of his salad days, now long passed. It’s going to be a crushing reminder of time’s relentless march when all he has to collect are Milk of Magnesia bottles and the detritus of individually-wrapped Cream Savers. If I were you, I’d start drinking heavily so as not to let the poor fellow down. Won’t somebody please think of the old people?
That is all.
I blame you if the old guy doesn’t make it. You’re obligated to guzzle, dammit.
hmmm…i don’t know if you’d call two apes sitting around drawing pictures of penises and drinking beer on weeknights a ‘party’, but i suppose one might see it that way…
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