Dowbrigade

Hotel heiress and reality TV star Paris Hilton today called for an end to the controversy over Sen. John Kerry’s Vietnam War service, warning that the continuing swift boat flap was distracting attention away from her.
from the Borowitz Report

Terrorists will paralyze the Internet on August 26,
a Russian expert in antivirus programs said on Tuesday.
Speaking at a conference hosted by Russian Information Agency Novosti,
Aleksandr Gostev from Kaspersky Labs said information on this terrorist
[...]

Truth
eventually eclipses fiction, even legendary folk tales like the stories
of Babe, Paul Bunyons giant blue ox……
For a glimpse of what post-human athletes may look like
beginning in the 2012 or 2016 Olympics, [...]

Vs.
Mystery solved.  The Olympic
sport we chanced across
the other day and couldn’t identify was none other than the ever-popular
HANDBALL!! Obviously, the reason we had never seen it before is that
[...]