Hugo Chavez Announces New World Order

Long
a fan of world-class political bloviation, we were hoping to catch some
of the most mesmerizing snake-oil salesmen working the curcuit today in New
York this week.  We
were especially excited at the possibility of seeing of the Presidents
of
Iraq, Pakistan
and Venezuela.

This week, to celebrate the 60th
anniversary of the United Nations, over 150 Presidents and Heads
of State have gathered in New York City to pontificate, hob-nob, and
shop. The average daily temperature is predicted to rise several degrees
due to the surfeit of hot air.

We were hoping to get down to the Big Apple to catch
some of the ancilliary events, but unfortunately, responsibility reared
its ugly head in the form of our day job, about
which
we are terminally forbidden to blog, having taken a blood oath to that
effect. Coincidentally, Chavez also cancelled
all of his

planned
events. After
a visa
snafu reminiscent of when his buddy Fidel came to the UN,
his very arrival in New York was in doubt because of problems getting
visas for
his doctors
and
security
detail. He appearantly decided to simplify things and stay well within
his security envelope.

The only speech he did end up making was before the General Assembly
where he used his alloted ten minutes to predict $100
a barrel oil, call for
a completely new
world economic and political order, and demand that
the United Nations move
out of the United States (he suggested Jerusalem).Who knows what
else he would have said if they hadn’t cut his mike at the end of his
alloted
turn?

Confidential but confiable sources inform
the Dowbrigade that Chavez’s activities were cancelled due to scheduling
and security concerns related to the President’s desire to visit Radio
City Music Hall, Bill Clinton’s office in Harlem, and a Santeria priest
in Flushing, Queens.

here is an English
translation of Chavez’s comments today to the United Nations General Assembly