TISK: The Inadvertent Searchee (and the Katydid)!
night in the hut
searching on the shelf
. . . katydid
….. by Kobayashi Issa, translated by David G. Lanoue
As either f/k/a or ethicalEsq, this weblog shows up remarkably often at or near the top of the results of search-engine queries. Here are some instances that I found interesting, odd, or otherwise worthy of comment — usually because they were so inadvertent, or because they demonstrate how a little weblog (with a few links from its friends, but without using “search engine optimization” tricks) can get its perspective, pet peeves and crusades in a position to be read by enquiring minds across the planet.
Sept.1, 2007: The f/k/a Gang has — quite inadvertently, of course — been very negligent about updating this webpage over the past year. Last week, in a strange exchange with the folk at the Antitrust Review weblog, we looked at some of our favorite TISK! blurbs and checked their current search engine status. This is our report:
Here are some of the results. An f/k/a post is the:
- #1 Google Search result for <lawyer telling clients they are damned fools>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for <sexual relations with clients>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for <objection to self discipline>
- #1 Google Search result for <passive lying of lawyers>
- #1 Google Search result for <ironic vs coincidental?>
- formerly #1 Google Search result for, now #2 <won’t stop mentioning prior relationships>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for <blind date boomers>
one glass of wine -
Google keeps asking
“Did you mean _____?”
past their peak -
boomers’ first date
…………………………… by dagosan
- formerly #1 Yahoo Search result for, now #2 <lauren hutton AARP image>
- #1 Google Search result for<closed eyelids>and #3 for <lawyers naps>
- formerly #1 Google Search result for, now #5 <getting goosed>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for<how to make a two-year-old behave>
- #1 Google Search result for <happiest lawyers>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for <perception of expertise>
- #1 Google Search result for <”reversing bad karma“>
The beetle I righted
flies straight into
…………………………………. by George Swede
- #1 Google Search result for <”new jersey” soup slurping>
- #1 Google Search result for <”males don’t wear outfits“>
- [no, not Above the Law] #1 Yahoo Search result for <gorgeous lawyers>
- formerly #1 Google Search result for, now #2 <nicknames lawyers>
- formerly #1, now #2 <restroom equity>
- #1 Yahoo Search result for <self-aggrandize>
Editor’s note & update (Aug. 27, 2007), 8 AM: I just reGoogled <antitrust sexy> and got a very big surprise, and smile; the post you are reading right now is the:
- #1 Google Search result for <antitrust sexy>
update (11 AM, Aug. 26): Well, my campaign to move Antitrust Review to the top of the heap for matters of antitrust humor has been remarkably successful. As of 11 AM this morning, Antitrust Review holds the #1 spot in Google search results for both <antitrust lawyer jokes> and <antitrust humor>, while f/k/a is still on top for <antitrust and sexy>. David Fischer and his joint venturers may have to change their tune about sex vs. humor. The mystery of the Google Search Algorithm continues.
April 8, 2006:
Feeling our ethnic oats:
<italian word gumba> We had the #1 and #2 (out of 932) results in this
Google search. See our essay goomba goombah gumba gumbah, and –
for “gumbah” used in cultural context – sing the lyrics of Nick Appol Forte’s
spot in this Google query, out of 42,000 results.
<sychophants’ responses> We don’t have these, but the 1st of 41,200 results in
this Yahoo! search was our discussion of taxes and sycophants in athens (where
the rich were proud to pay taxes!).
Which reminds me, thanks to a little help from weblog friends,
is also the first Google results for one of my favorite neologistic
April 4, 2006
Some poor soul Googled <how to get out of the legal profession>.
Out of 152 million results, the first two are from us. You could do a lot
worse than reading them, if you need professional inspiration or better priorities:
Law As Daily Passion, Not Default Profession (quotes from New
Jersey Appellate Judge Jose L. Fuentes) and
is Canada’s legal profession different? (probably not)
March 24, 2006
<weblog culture> #1 and #2 of 44,500,000 Google results went to our page
on Weblog Culture & Ethics page.
As for legal profession issues dear to our heart and important
<lawyer client self fool> We had the #2 and #3 of 1.6 million results in this
self-regulation on the same page. In the other, we quoted a NYSBA brochure
that was discouraging self-help by con-sumers. What Google should have f
eatured: our quote from Edward Day Parsons:
“He who pleads his own case may have a fool for a client; but it’s
more probable that he who employs a lawyer will have a knave for
<lawyer value billing> The first two results out of 17 million in this Google search.
came from f/k/a (the internet’s lone voice of caution on this issue). For example,
<What Is An Appropriate Contingency Fee> The first two of nearly 4 million results
certain dignified p/i lawyer. Now, if only the good-guy tort lawyers would read
up and take it too heart.
<lawyer telling clients when they are damned fools> First two of almost half a
million Google results came from f/k/a, for this very important concept. We
“Elihu Root . . . put the matter more simply: ‘About
half the practice of a decent lawyer,’ he once said,
‘consists in telling would-be clients that they are
damned fools and should stop.’
“Today there are too few lawyers who see it as
part of their function to tell clients (especially new
clients) that they are damned fools and should stop:
Any such statement would interfere with the marketing
program. The public pays, because the rule of law is
<fiduciary obligations of attorneys> #1 of 2.5 million Google results, on
a topic that doesn’t get enough discussion in the legal profession, was
Of course, some of the search engine results seem to be a bit more inadvertent
<haiku perspiration> #4 of 15,000 in the Google search,
which lets me repeat the poem in question from my alter
across flat abs –
<Stop buying expensive coffee and save> #3 of 3.8 million Google results
was our commentary about law students spending far too much on luxuries
and adding needlessly to their law school debt. (Sometimes, we sound like
old fuddy-duddiesaround here.)
<how big is a F cup> #1 of almost 9 million Yahoo! search results.
As usual, old Master Issa is the culprit (along with the “f” in our name):
in a big sake cup.
moon and a flea
<owen wilson erection in speedo> – Yesterday, we were #1 out of 309 in this
Yahoo query. That’s what I get for featuring the book Taboo Haiku. Go here
to see the provoking poems. [Oddly, the same Yahoo! search today doesn't
even show f/k/a in the top 40. Talk about inconsistent performance.]
update (5 PM, March 24): I don’t know who’s looking up <halloween sex>, but
our post on pols vs. sex offenders was the #2 result out of 5.3 million in a Yahoo!
Search today. Our own attempts to find out more about the Smith v. Peterson
“early bather” case, revealed that the f/k/a post of the subject is the #1 result when
Googling <“Sheldon Smith” lawyer> today.
one glass of wine
Google keeps asking
“Did you mean ____?”
using his nose
the dog searches
translated by David G. Lanoue
TISK! pt. 1 can be found here.
TISK! pt. 2 can be found here.
TISK! pt. 3 can be found here.