One Life

I sit here in front of window 21 at the Hirabari Driver’s License Testing Facility. I just took my test – which went wonderfully UNTIL I didn’t notice a truck coming from the left side before I turned. The tester slammed on the breaks – I was in disbelief. I had everything memorized perfectly, driving carefully. I just totally didn’t see it. It was my only mistake, but it was a big one. I apologized and asked for his favor. In human eyes I’m at his mercy. In reality though I’m only at the mercy of God. The sovereignty of God has become a close friend to me of recent days. Not merely a theological understanding that God is in control – of course He is. But instead a tremendous confidence and comfort that:

1) God is in control – of everything
2) God is sovereignly working out all that He has sovereignly ordained from eternity past both in this world and in my life – including my salvation and my sanctification
3) Suffering was the very design of glory – namely God ordained suffering, sin, evil (with impunity regarding His character for He is without sin and is perfect) – for the lives of non-Christians (to teach them of their need for Christ), for Christians (to make us more and more like Christ), and for Christ Himself (to display in unfathomable fashion the glory of God in salvation the cross of Jesus Christ – the centerpiece around which not only all time stands but all things were planned)
4) Suffering is not a sign of the rejection of God but instead the faithfulness of God who will not let us stay as we are
5) We miss opportunity after opportunity when we react to God-ordained suffering in our lives with complaint, despair, and a turning away from God
6) We miss the whole meaning of the Christian faith when we live our lives whole-heartedly seeking to avoid suffering and discomfort – seeking to be comfortable physically, financially, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually – in the middle when God is calling us to live on the edge
7) There is a greater comfort that comes to the pilgrim who will walk the paths where Christ leads – a comfort and peace that surpasses understanding – even in the midst of tremendous suffering – a path that leads to our eternal home – where there will be no more tears, crying, or pain.

For those suffering now, a reminder.

God understands your suffering – He made all things
God is compassionate towards your suffering – He does not rejoice in the suffering itself – it is only a tool that the sovereign God uses for His glory and your sanctification; God does not delight in evil – but even uses what man “meant for evil” for His good (Joseph).
Much of what we call suffering is simply what I call “common suffering” – namely there is suffering in this world that is no respecter of faith. Much suffering in this world is the same for both Christians and non-Christians – for all people. This would include physical illness, work problems (unless they are specifically because you are a Christian), family difficulties, financial problems, driver’s license tests (smile), etc. For many of us who live in the economically advanced nations of the world (America, Japan, Europe, etc.) there is so much common suffering that we never taste. We have low infant mortality, we have food on our tables, we hardly walk anywhere unless in the mall or for exercise, we live in a democracy, we have medical care, we are educated, and we live in safe neighborhoods.

But there is another suffering that is specifically because you are a Christian which I call “Christ’s suffering.” The Bible speaks of this again and again. 1 Peter – “rejoice in as much as you partake in the sufferings of Christ” (my paraphrase). Or again Philippians 1:29 “For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for him.” Many Christians have rarely or never experienced such suffering. Their lives are so hidden, so innocuous to this world that their lives don’t bother non-Christians or Satan at all. They are better left alone and unstirred. Sometimes God seeks to rouse these people through the grace of common suffering. Embrace these graces as the Lord grabs you by the ear to drag you into the hospice, the refuge of walking closely with Him. As the Lord brings such suffering instead of “WHY LORD?!” cry out, “More of Jesus, more of Jesus in my life!”

But others around the world are experiencing tremendous suffering – both common and Christ’s. Because they are living out the life of Jesus Christ people around them stumble. The government which hates Christ stumbles and lashes out in persecution around the world.

For those of you living in a wealthy democracy, you also have opportunity to experience the suffering of Christ and the joy which comes from it even if soldiers are not bursting through your church doors or you are sharing the Gospel with your neighbors in secret. For many faithful Christians in this part of the world, you have ample opportunity to honor Christ and in doing so experiencing His suffering. Your family members who live with an entirely different worldview stumble as your life makes no sense to them. Your boss who wants you to compromise and your co-workers who want you to play their way stumble because your life reminds them that something’s not right in theirs. You forsake a lifestyle which society tells you is your right and your salvation to live simply, sacrificially and generously. You leave your profession to bring the Gospel to the unreached around the world who would have no opportunity to hear it, believe it, and be saved unless someone went to them.

Peter teaches plainly that our JOY is correlated with our experiencing of the sufferings of Christ. Did you ever feel that you have so little joy in your life and wonder why? Perhaps you have blamed God for this. Perhaps you’ve tried to satisfy that desire for joy in other ways outside of God? Or even closely to God in singing praise songs, in experiencing a mission trip, etc. – all of which are good things but if we are seeking the blessing of God in JOY rather than primarily God Himself that blessing can become an idol.

As you read this you may be thinking, very falsely, that these issues are all settled and properly lined up in my life. It’s far from the case. Over the past 6 years in preparation for starting Christ Bible Seminary, we’ve experienced some fair amount of what I called suffering, even Christ’s suffering. We’ve experienced common suffering (sickness, separation from family, and relational challenges) which have become Christ’s sufferings because they were experienced because of and experienced more harshly because of serving as missionaries. We’ve seen the hand of Satan working with power and pain in our lives and around us. But I think over the past few days I’ve realized that I can’t call anything that we experience “suffering.” I think of my friend Alemu in Ethiopia with his 12 kids and the multiple times he was nearly killed. I think of my friend Ken in China who before leaving seminary asked us “not to pray for the opening of China but for the continued opening of the hearts of the Chinese.” I think of John Bunyan and his 12 years in jail, Jim Elliot and friends who were martyred, Elizabeth Elliot and friends who were widowed and still took the Gospel to the tribe that killed their husbands, and countless others who for the sake of the cross were tortured, maimed, raped, and blinded throughout the centuries. I think of Jesus Christ… how can it be that I should gain an interest in the savior’s blood? Died He for me who caused His pain, for me to Him to death pursued. I confess that I do not fully grasp the cross of Jesus Christ – the magnitude of His suffering and His love – but what I do grasp is enough to drive me to my knees before the Lord in worship and thanksgiving.

Not three weeks ago I was feeling tremendous despair over the “suffering” I was going through. I saw the hand of Satan; I saw the hand of God, but my heart was clinging to the darkness in hopelessness rather than clinging to Christ. My theology was in order, but my heart and faith were tired, angry, and hopeless without Christ. But O how thankful I am for this experience! Without these tears and heartache I would never have known such sweet surrender to the beauty of the sovereignty of God! There are times in your life when things are quiet – neither anything particularly difficult in your life nor particularly wonderful. Most of the time we’re thankful for these seasons. I’m learning to be thankful for the valleys, life on the edge, because it is in the valley that the Lord has both gone before us and also stands beside us with His rod and His staff and it is on the edge where Gods hand is to hold us. Would you pray for me that I would know the fullness of these things that I am only now beginning to taste.

35 minutes until the results of my driver’s test comes out. Let me stop now so I can talk with this man from Pakistan next to me. Perhaps the Lord will give me a chance to share about my Lord….

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Didn’t pass. Really disappointing since this process takes hours and weeks of time I don’t have, but it is well with my soul. I prayed that if the Lord saw it best for me not to pass again – that it would be best for my faith and for the Kingdom then I am content. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

PS – if you want to get a sense of the frustration of the driver’s license process (or anything in Japan that is administrative) read all the articles on the drama of getting resumption of US beef sales in Japan. It captures things fairly well I think. By the way last week the 26th confimed case of mad cow was discovered in Japan. America has had 3 cases.