Phone calls and famous people
Today I spent the morning working on projects for Bob Bordone and the Harvard Negotiation Clinical Program. Part of the research required me to call other law schools and ask about some materials they use in their own clinical programs, a task that, a month ago, I would have approached with dread. I remember a few weeks ago having to call up organizations to invite them to the PON Internship Fair; I was so convinced I would mess up that I typed out a script word-for-word.
Luckily, I didn’t quite have to take that precaution this time. But this round of phone calls did make me realize how many of my own fears and weaknesses I’ve been forced to confront over the course of the last month, from the mundane and rather silly (phones!) to some larger issues, like feeling intimidated by people around me. I can recall several instances here when I was made fully aware of how nervous I can unconsciously become when in the presence of people I greatly respect.
The most striking of these instances was probably getting to meet Bernard Lafayette, a legendary civil rights activist and nonviolence instructor who worked closely with Martin Luther King, Jr. Mr. Lafayette gave a talk at PON last Thursday, and some PON staff members had an informal lunch and discussion with him afterwards. What an incredible and overwhelming experience – I couldn’t believe I was actually sitting next to this person and watching him eat Doritos! I found it humbling to imagine the enormous breadth of experiences in Mr. Lafayette’s memory, and how they each might have contributed to his current outlook on life. When someone has been through as much as he has, it seems like their past has such a palpable presence that you can just feel its tremendous importance – even if the specific picture of each experience and memory is blurry.
It was a new experience for me in many ways, and the lunch and discussion after Mr. Lafayette’s talk definitely took me out of my comfort zone for a while. I’m very used to being an attentive audience member at lectures, and not used to being asked for my opinion by such insightful people! But I probably needed to be put on the hot seat like I was – I learned a lot from being an actual part of the group, and I even surprised myself a bit with my own ability to participate in the discussion.
For now, though, I’m looking forward to the weekend and to getting a fresh start on Monday. Have I mentioned how weird it feels not to have to spend Saturday and Sunday doing homework?