f/k/a archives . . . real opinions & real haiku

October 27, 2005

Ozzie dumps Harriet

Filed under: pre-06-2006 — David Giacalone @ 2:52 pm

She once called him her “Sweet W” and the smartest man she knew.

But, that didn’t stop the Wizard of Oz — Chief Executive of Emerald City

— from jilting Harriet Quagmier, his longtime courtesan, this morning. 

Calling it only a change in titles, the dispirited Harriet is expected to

remain at the Wiz House long enough to save face.


O&HNelson  orig.


There have, of course, been rumors of a break-up for weeks.  Some

sources blame it on angry in-laws, others on religious differences.

Palace gossip has described shouting matches with epithets such

as “brainless,” “heartless” and “cowardly.”  Others say the Wizard

could no longer trust Harriet to keep his secrets behind that curtain.


                                                                                orig.  DorothyScarecrow


At the other end of the Yellow Brick Road, there is much talk — among

both nominally-loyal noblemen as well as rivals — that the Wizard already

has a replacement for Harriet.  Shockingly, it is unknown whether the

next courtesan is male or female, West Coast or East Coast, strict or



The f/k/a news organization will be following this story ’round the clock,

but is admittedly confused over the cast of characters.  It seems clear

that the Wizard is not taking advice from the Good Witch of the North;

whether Harriet’s archrival, the Wicked Witch of the West, has his ear

(or other parts of his anatomy) is still unknown. 



On the other hand, names as diverse as Thorny Thornberry, Herb Darby,

Doc Williams, and Butch Barton, have been suggested as Harriet’s

replacement, along with two younger men referred to only as Wally and

Barry, and Constance Edwards, a legal secretary.   We would not be

surprised to hear more gossip about other women, soon.


Stay tuned.




coffee shop . . .

   the only empty seat

   still warm


diner dude gray







evening walk

after office politics

lilac sent








through the open door . . .

her smile doesn’t forgive

all my sins



“coffee shop” & “through” – School’s Out (Press Here, 1999) 

“evening walk” – Modern Haiku (Autumn 2003)






  • by dagosan                                               

her marriage —

she says

it’s fine


 [Oct. 27, 2005]



                                                                                                                 happier days





  1. come see the latest Roadrunner!

    Comment by Jason — October 28, 2005 @ 11:35 am

  2. come see the latest Roadrunner!

    Comment by Jason — October 28, 2005 @ 11:35 am

RSS feed for comments on this post.

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.

Powered by WordPress